Welcome to the blog of science fiction author Eileen Rhoadarmer--where science fiction and Mommyhood collide!

Monday, December 13, 2010

Getting Nervous About a Big Finish

My novel is now nearly 80,000 words and is 137 pages single spaced on my computer.  I don't know whether I'm on track to finish by the end of the month or not, mostly because I don't know if some of the remaining "chapters" will lengthen into two or three to convey everything that is going to happen.  But I'm definitely close, even if it runs a little into January.  And I'm getting a little nervous about the prospect of being finished with something so big.

Now again, I'm not done yet.  I still have a major climax to write myself through, but simply having the ending in sight, knowing I've been working on this for more than five months, knowing I still have a few major decisions about the ending to make and that the time when I'll have to make them is rapidly approaching, are all contributing to making me feel a bit odd.  I'll be happy to move on to other things, but I'll also be sad to say good-bye for a while.  After all, I've been getting to know these characters for a long time now--much longer than I've ever worked with other characters before, at least all at once.

It almost feels like a relationship.  If you date someone for a few weeks and it fizzles out, there isn't usually too much remorse.  It just wasn't meant to be.  But when you devote several months to somebody, leaving is much harder (or easier I suppose, if things really went south--but if the novel had gone south it's a safe bet that I probably wouldn't have taken it this far.)  On the other hand, I won't be leaving the novel for good.  I'll be taking some space and then coming back for round two at some later time.  So it isn't a breakup after all, just a separation while I explore other venues, and then I'll come back and pick up where I left off.  And I'll be able to look at it with more distanced eyes and see whether it was all it was cracked up to be, or not all that good.

Okay, this post really took a tangent.  It's really more like graduating or leaving a job than a relationship, but oh well.  Basically, I'm saying I'm nervous about coming to the end.  But I said that in the title, didn't I?


David Barron said...

Just remember, You'll have broken up with Him. That means you won the relationship.

And then you get to sell him.

Anonymous said...

Just wait until you right "The End."

Yeah, that will be weird.

Anonymous said...

Who wears the pants in this relationship? :)

I've got 37k left on my novel, also trying to get done. Let's push each other through. :D

I like to start the new year clean.... let's go!

Eileen Rhoadarmer said...

Who would have thought comparing writing to relationships would get so many responses!

Dawn--you're on!